Barbara J. Hamby

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Whose Lifestyle is Best

This month’s AARP online Bulletin has an article by a single woman, who has always been single and never aspired to be coupled. She believes that all the hype about married people having better lives, is just that. I suspect raising the question of who has it better could spark a lot of controversy among members of all groups: i.e., the single, the married, the divorced, the widowed, as well as the live-togethers. Having been a member of each of those groups at various times in my life, I would be hard pressed to declare any status “the best.” So much depends on the personality of the individual and, among those coupled, the personalities of each.

I think what makes a person happy also depends on what stage of life he or she is in. I lived alone happily for many years, but began to feel a need for companionship after I retired and noticed body parts deteriorating. It is comforting to have someone to compare notes with, especially someone who is near your own age. There is a sense of security in having someone nearby who can, at the very least, summon help if you are in need and unable to do so.

Silly little incidents can temporarily throw you out of commission. Case in point: the T.V. dinner I heated for myself tonight, had the instructions printed on the bottom, as many of them do. I’d like to slap upside the head the genius who decided on that print job. I was holding it above my head, looking up and trying to figure out which part of my trifocals to read it through, when I got dizzy and lost my balance. I hit my head on the sharp corner of the range vent. Fortunately I didn’t knock myself out or fall. I was glad about that because I wasn’t sure whether Floyd would be back from meetings out of town tonight or tomorrow.

The only time I remember knocking myself out, I had raised up under a cupboard door. I was married, but I was alone and unpacking kitchenware in a house we were moving into. I’ll never know how long I was out, but I woke up on the floor and was cold. All around me were broken bone china cups and saucers that had bounced out of the box I dropped. I imagine if I had stayed there long enough, my husband would have come looking for me. A single person might not be found as quickly.

Anyway, far be it from me to decide for anyone what lifestyle is best.

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