Barbara J. Hamby

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Truth in Advertising

Hilltop View - Pusan, South Korea

Tonight I ate a fourth of a watermelon designated by Fred Meyer as “personal size.” The sticker says “seedless,” but also says something to the effect that there may be occasional seeds. Come on now, shall we examine the adjective “occasional.” There were at least 25 black seeds and probably about 100 white ones in the piece I ate. The melon was cold, ripe, red and delicious, but the seeds were a nuisance. Even spitting them down the garbage disposal is not that much fun.

Perhaps they mean that none of those seeds is fertile and would generate a new watermelon plant if placed in the ground. I don’t feel inclined to research that.

“No sugar added” is another deceitful description. In order to be sure you’re not overloaded with simple carbohydrates, you must examine the nutritional label carefully.

“Reduced fat” always makes me mentally ask, “Reduced from what? Replaced with what?”

In spite of spending hours carefully reading food labels, I am not now, nor is it likely I will ever be sylph-like. Don’t even get me started on clothing labels and advertising.

It’s almost chilly with the windows open in this room tonight, but the cool is very welcome.